When love blinds you

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Translated from the original sermon notes.

Read 2 Samuel 13 (consequences after David sinned).
Amnon, David’s son, fell in love with his own sister, Tamar (the same father (David) but with a different mom). In the Torah, it’s not allowed to marry with your own sibling, therefore Amnon forced and raped Tamar (verse 14). Amnon changed though, from loving Tamar to hating her. In verse 15: “Then Amnon hated her with very great hatred, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her“. Absalom, his brother, knew about this and swore for a revenge. Two years after, Amnon was murdered by Absalom.


1) Know when we’re really fall in love

In verse 1, the Bible says that Amnon fell in love. But the forgot about things that he need to think about really seriously. He fell so deeply in love but it’s all lust, not pure love.

Test yourself whether you are really fall in love with someone:

  • Time: love needs time. If it happens all of a sudden, then it’s lust, not love.
  • Knowledge: love means to know a lot of his/her good and bad characters, not just a particular one or from physical appearance.
  • Focus: true love focuses on the others, to the other person that we love.
  • Distance: true love doesn’t change even when distance breaks us apart.
  • Physical attraction: crazily in love (not true love) only focuses on physical appearance.
  • Barriers: people who are crazily in love doesn’t care about rules, regulations, or word of God.

2) Don’t focus on physical appearances

Amnon loved Tamar just because she was beautiful (verse 1). The world always views love as physical attraction (appearance) first and spirituality comes last. We, as children of God, focus on spirituality first, appearance last! Focus on someone who loves God, not because he is handsome or because she is beautiful.

3) Amnon can’t differentiate between love and sex

World view: “If you love me, give me your body”. Sex is beautiful but only in marriage. Sex outside of marriages is an adultery and destroying our lives! Learn from Amnon so that we have a full control of ourselves, not being controlled by lust!

The word “hate” that is being used on the original meaning (Amnon to Tamar) is the same as the word being used to explain Absalom’s hatred to Amnon.

True love consists of: Eros (romance), Phileo (friendship, giving time, communication), Agape (pure love, sacrificial, love that is giving)

Learn from Amnon’s mistake!

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Michael Aulia is a Christian blogger who lives in Australia. He is the owner of WriteForGod.com and also CravingTech.com

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